a dream that painted my day blue....

had a nightmare last night... i dreamt of someone i love, had a mishap while we were playing jet-ski (which i doubt i will). i was totally devastated. i cried badly in the dream till i woke up. my eyes seemed swollen. it feels so real. though, i did not see who is the person but it was very depressing. somehow, affected my mood for the rest of the day. feels so emo...

many thoughts flow across my mind.. the first time a guy put a ring on my finger... (now i realised that it takes alot of courage for a guy to buy and put the ring on a woman's finger) how i got my first job.. things that happened there. how tough for me to get my degree while working.. why i switched industry.. how fun and tough sales was.. how i knew him.. how we got together.. how tough it was.. why we parted.. till i met another.. and ended badly.. i would never want to see him again... i do not deny i was very happy then but seemed like things just do not end happily ever after.. am glad i am still contact with the earlier.. despite having to meet another now, every weekend seems like a torture at times yet i do enjoy the lazing feeling alone at home.. doing my own stuff.. cleaning my room.. meeting friends out for tea and dinner..

saw HL's pics on fb and im happy for her. she started dating much later.. has been with this bf for a number of years and i guess they are going to get hitched soon.. the first one and the last.. :) have been going in circles and am tired.. i understand what Angie meant by her heart is 'dead'.. sooner or later, mine too... sometimes, it is just abit too much and tiring. seems like a roller coaster..

after much said, being healthy is always the most important. today's a gift, tmr is a surprise.. god bless..