emotion outburst and not feeling well...

my nose has been blocked for the whole day... feeling so sick and moody today. boring. was thinking of asking bel or sarina out but just do not feel well hence, decided to stay home. he is out with his friends tonight. at last, hearing that his friends are complaining. hehe. just msg me that he will be calling me when he is back.

whats wrong with me? reducing his hp usage alrite i understand, what about residential line? ok.. he is tired.. at work.. sleeping.. i really do not feel good somewhere in my heart. has he got tired of me or time for a change? that is how i feel and i do not feel good at all. as time pass by, once i decided to let go and i will. i hate to feel like a pendulum swinging in the air. i can still feel his concern to call me when he is home etc but when we are out, i have the feeling that he is so 'distanced' from me. the mutual eye contact that we used to have is fading away...

what's f***ing wrong with me? i have the feeling that im starting to let go already. i am just a person who is new in his life and wanted to know more about me out of curiosity. once he knows me more, he will feel bored and the end. yah like what mr huang said why he left me w/o telling me, 'cause im childish and cannot be independent. who is never childish when it comes to r/s? not including settling of problems. im just a sidekick in the end. when the guys are bored in a phrase of their life, im just someone interesting to entertain them. i am independent but do not let me feel that things are changing... if i am not anyone u look forward to be with, tell me. 'cause i can feel it. i am a human. time ok... time... maybe im just expecting and thinking too much, im only his 普通朋友....